i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
