I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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