My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
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