It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
what day is it and did you see me today?
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize