How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Randomize
