Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Randomize
