So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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