how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
