You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I am mentally ready for anal.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
