I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Randomize
