Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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