Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
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