bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
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