this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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