So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
This is my gift to your gina
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
