i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Damn victory sex feels great
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
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