Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I understand Curling. That high.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize