we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Randomize
