i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
He passed out mid-signature
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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