im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
