Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
