some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
