If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
