Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Randomize