I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize