you guys were way drunker than both of me
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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