i need an iv and a liver transplant
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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