went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Randomize
