she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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