Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Duck Duck Cougar?
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize