So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Randomize
