I'm gonna have a badass scar
Duck Duck Cougar?
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
