sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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