Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Randomize
