We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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