Whod you bang
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
