cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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