I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
3pm strippers are depressing
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
