I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
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