No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize
