Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
