No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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