He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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