Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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