I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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