My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
