No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Randomize
