Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
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