sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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