My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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