That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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